Life: Uncertainty of the future
Hello Assalamualaikum
It's been quite awhile right. Life has been hitting me so hard with so many things, but at the end of the day, the biggest fight and the biggest disappointment is myself. I realized more and more that i have so many internal issues and conflict that needs to be addressed. But i guess i'm so messed up to the point that addressing these issues makes me even more confused. I have no idea what i'm doing, what i should be doing, even what i want is getting blurry. I wish things were easier, i wish i didn't have to think this much. Being and adult, and being responsible to myself, my own little unworthy self, sounds so petty but damn, it's so hard. I dare say, I've never been so lost. I'm not progressing in any aspect at all, except for overthinking obviously. All that i want comes in a package with a long winding road of challenges. But is it worth it ? even if i go through all the challenges, will i get the outcome that i want. Nothing is for sure and it's killing me slowly when i think of it. What should i do ? what would be best for me ?
But guess what, I will never know. That's why it's important to rely to a higher power and believe whatever comes my way is the best for me in this moment. I used to think awesome people set goals. Having a goal and able to achieve them are the definition of being successful to me all this while. but i realized something recently, having a goal, is good enough, cause it gives you a sense of direction, what to do and the outcome you are going for. But if things don't go the way we want it and at the end we didn't achieve the goal, whatever we did, is never a waste. It was just a part of life that we were meant to go through, a lesson, an experience that was specifically designed for us to shape us to become who we are, to make us better human beings, better servants of the Lord too. Only we don't know it yet. Having trust is important, believe, that one day when we look back at the struggles and the mistakes and the so called of waste of time, energy or money moment, it was all for something, a bigger purpose that we will never know now, but will be worth it once we look back in the future later. So trust, trust in God's plan. Not achieving a goal doesn't make you a failure.
It's been quite awhile right. Life has been hitting me so hard with so many things, but at the end of the day, the biggest fight and the biggest disappointment is myself. I realized more and more that i have so many internal issues and conflict that needs to be addressed. But i guess i'm so messed up to the point that addressing these issues makes me even more confused. I have no idea what i'm doing, what i should be doing, even what i want is getting blurry. I wish things were easier, i wish i didn't have to think this much. Being and adult, and being responsible to myself, my own little unworthy self, sounds so petty but damn, it's so hard. I dare say, I've never been so lost. I'm not progressing in any aspect at all, except for overthinking obviously. All that i want comes in a package with a long winding road of challenges. But is it worth it ? even if i go through all the challenges, will i get the outcome that i want. Nothing is for sure and it's killing me slowly when i think of it. What should i do ? what would be best for me ?
But guess what, I will never know. That's why it's important to rely to a higher power and believe whatever comes my way is the best for me in this moment. I used to think awesome people set goals. Having a goal and able to achieve them are the definition of being successful to me all this while. but i realized something recently, having a goal, is good enough, cause it gives you a sense of direction, what to do and the outcome you are going for. But if things don't go the way we want it and at the end we didn't achieve the goal, whatever we did, is never a waste. It was just a part of life that we were meant to go through, a lesson, an experience that was specifically designed for us to shape us to become who we are, to make us better human beings, better servants of the Lord too. Only we don't know it yet. Having trust is important, believe, that one day when we look back at the struggles and the mistakes and the so called of waste of time, energy or money moment, it was all for something, a bigger purpose that we will never know now, but will be worth it once we look back in the future later. So trust, trust in God's plan. Not achieving a goal doesn't make you a failure.
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