Random rants: The blame game

I'm disappointed in myself
I vowed to never be the kind of person that i hate
But, slowly, that persona creeped into me without me realizing
How could this happen ?
I'm putting other people in situations that i hate the most
I don't want to hurt others how i was hurt
I don't want to be anybody's source of pain
I feel like I'm becoming my worst nightmare
And its scares me so much
Is this what i amount to at the end of the day ?
It can't be
I always wanted to be good, wanted to be kind, wanted to be loving, so that i could be loved.
But who wants to love me now ?
I wouldn't love me either.

Blaming myself is an easy way out
But i feel so unhappy.
But how, how do i escape this attitude and be happy ?


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