Reflection upon reflection

I think i question myself a lot lately, its good in a way, because i'm reflecting a lot. (Although i still don't know where the heck i stand in a lot of things.)

The bad side of things is that, its quite unhealthy for me apparently, cause my brain is way too active, it interferes with some other aspects of life, like my eating and sleeping habits. But other than that, all is good and well. Taking advantage of this time to work out and actually lose weight.

However, the good things do weigh more than the bad things. I'm seeing myself in a new light, I'm seeing life in a new light and my relationship with Allah is renewed again. (as usual, iman is an up and down journey for me)

I watched a post by asma.nasa telling that we should keep the conversation with God continuously and comfortably. So this morning while waiting for subuh (i'm fasting) i sat down and doa the normal doa and after that i started talking about this and that casually and well it felt good. I guess it kinda feels like i'm spilling all my happiness and sorrow to someone who i know will always do things in my best interest only. I could totally let go of everything and truly rely on Him

On top of that, I'm learning daily to be mindful, to be self-compassionate, to be grateful, to accept everything as it is and to let go of expectations. 

It's not an easy journey, but definitely a very interesting and fulfilling journey to growth.

Hey future shakirah, you're awesome, you'll be fine, just enjoy the ride.